Squad Academy Subjects

*Beginning in January, we will begin our regular schedule of classes and orientation will begin it's transition to history.*

Subjects for incoming academy students:

History (formerly orientation)

LRS history is a requirement for each of the five years of your study here at the Llama Retribution Squad Academy. Don't even think about trying to skip this class.

Mathematics

Any academy student must have a thorough understanding of counting, adding, subtracting, using multiplication tables, division, and non-linear algebra.

Science

All academy students are trained in general sciences such as: Basic Physics, Simple Life Sciences, Elementary Earth Sciences. All fourth year students may choose their advanced science subjects from the following: Advanced Cloud Identification, Avoiding Falling Out of Trees 2, Blood and Why You Need It to Live 4, and of course, everyone's favorite: Poisons: Oops You Drank From the Wrong Vial.

LlamaSpeak

Formerly called English, all academy students are required to complete 5 years of LlamaSpeak. Fourth years and up may choose their advanced language subjects from the following: Communicating with Lions 8, Simple Elephant Phrases for Conversation While Waiting for your Starbucks Order 19, or Eloquence in Writing an Evil Plan 5.

PenKeeping

Two years of required classes. Choices include: What To Do When the Roomba Clogs, My Lion Forgot to Feed Me, Now What?, or Don't Headbutt the Pen: How Strong are These Pen Walls Really?  

Foreign Languages

Five years required classes. Choose from: Lion 1, Lion 2, Lion 3, Lion 4, Even Nora Can't Pass Lion 5, Elephant 1, Elephant 2, Giraffe 1, Giraffe 2, Penguin 1, Penguin 2, Evil Plans 1, Evil Plans 2, Evil Plans 3, Evil Plans 4, and Elsie's Grand Plan 5.

Basic Life Skills

Minimum of 4 years, 5 if planning to attend University. Choose from: Practical Battle Field Wound Stitching, Notes to Keep Your Family From Worrying, Cannibalism: How to Choose Your Next Dinner, Cooking for One or a Squadron, Does Black Tie Mean No Weapons and Other Etiquette, and Early Childhood Development: Keeping the Children Quiet While Mommy Assassinates the Lion.